Archive for October, 2010

Wuddup World?

I know it’s been a minute, and for that, I am sorry, but my school of choice got really real for a second there and I needed to focus on my studies.  Becoming an engineer is no joke.  And I’m no good at math??  Pshh… ya girl was strugglin, you hear me?  Ughh…


I just wanted to come on here really quickly and tell you a little story about my hair product choices with a lesson at the end.  Y’all ready?  Ok, here goes:

Once upon a time there was a lil’ diva named SuperCoils, who’s head was bequeath with a halo of coils and kinks.  She was often made fun of in school for being ashy, being that she suffered eczema.  Early on in life, she learned that she was allergic to artificial fragrances, some artificial colorings, grass, cashews, and a few other things…

She knew her dry skin needed EXTRA attention, and was subject to get angry and cuss her out at any moment (i.e. get ashy in public), and she dealt with it accordingly, being sure to show it a little extra love right after her showers and before bed.  And then the little diva grew up and decided to go natural.  Aww hell.

… so she decided to use “natural products” that smelled good, but didn’t look at the ingredients first.

… and her head started to itch like a muh-fugger… Why?

Because the products she was using had (dun-dun-duhhhhh) ARTIFICIAL FRAGRANCES  in them!

Lesson learned: your scalp has the same allergies as the rest of your skin, so if you have skin allergies, you WILL undoubtedly be allergic to some hair products.

This is where being a knowledgeable consumer comes in: you HAVE to know what you are putting on your body when you have allergies like mine.  Hell, if I put on lotion and walk through freshly-cut grass, I can guarantee that I will be in the hospital in less than an hour with a severe case of hives and a prescription for Prednisone, so why would I ever put “Creme de Lawn” on my hair?  Likewise, being that I have severely dry skin and an allergy to artificial fragrances, I like to use moisturizing products that lack artificial fragrance… ya dig?

So which product lines do I like to choose from?

I’m sooo glad you asked:

  1. Darcy’s Botanicals -awesome scents, slightly awesome price, great results on my hair.  Reviews to come soon!
  2. Qhemet Biologics – awesome scents, not to bad price, goes a LONG way, soothes my scalp.
  3. Bee Mine – awesome for the summer.  We’ll see about the winter.
  4. Kinky Curly – especially the Knot Today for detangling!  I don’t think the KCCC will be a repurchase.
  5. Uncle Funky’s Daughter – only the curl activating gel.  I don’t quite remember the name of it right now.

In essence, that’s what’s on my head right now, and my scalp and face are doing much better because of it!

Peace, Love, and Allergies!


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Dear Young World,

In all of the years I was under my parent’s roof, they only asked me what I wanted for Christmas twice, and every time I answered simply: “a little brother”.

Now that I’m old enough to know better, I see two things wrong with this request:

  1. The day after Thanksgiving is FAR too late to ask for a gift that has to bake for 9 months
  2. I should’ve asked for a BIG brother (which wouldn’t have happened, unless they adopted, but a girl can dream, right?)

Reason being: conversations like the one my Big Brother and I had last night… about men.

*audience breathes deeply* Yes, this is one of THOSE posts…

Basically, I asked why men will date a “good girl” or, to be more politically correct, one who wants a meaningful relationship and does not participate in more… physically-based ones.  I mean, it just seems like a waste of time to me!  I don’t know about everywhere else in the country, but here in Atlanta, finding a girl who is willing to just have sex with you and be done (also known as a “ho” to some, but I accept their choices and roll with my own) is, well, easy as pie.

McDonald’s apple pie… From the drive-thru.

So why break some young, hopeful, slightly-naive (read: superbly-coiled) girl’s heart with all the game playing when you could have just gotten with one of the numerous hoes of all shapes and sizes that inhabit even the most stringent of universities here in Atlanta (hey now, hoes be studyin’!) as well as the loosest of lounges (BTW, what’s up with a lounge?  I mean, I don’t like clubs, but a lounge?  A chill little negro like myself could get with a lounge… #imjussayin).  In essence, why misrepresent yourself in order to get into a win-lose situation, when you could be real about things and subsequently get a win-win?

My big brother’s answer:  Because either way, we still win, and we want what we want.  If that means hurting the girl… well… you can avoid her afterwards.

Damn.  Never thought about it like that.

But it does make a lot of sense: if you know that, no matter what, you’re going to win and you don’t care about the party who is subject to lose, why even make them a part of your thought process?  And let’s face it: most of the time, men (at my age… so fairly young) are on their DJ Khaled isht: they just wanna “win, win, win, no matter what”.

And it doesn’t matter if I lose.

So where does this leave me, you ask?  On a journey of self-discovery, as per his and Number1Roomie’s recommendation.  I think it’s time for me to take a step back before I become too frustrated or turn into someone I can’t look in the eye.  So, this year is dedicated to me… in my purest form: without sex.  I mean, it’s not going to be easy, but I’ve already got one week down, and only about 51 to go… right?  And I’m not taking myself completely away from men… I’ve just decided to take N1R’s advice and “chill”, i.e. let the right one find me.

I just hope the wrong one doesn’t find me first…

Peace, Love, and Big Brothers,


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Dear World,

Last week, while driving home to Warner Robins, GA, one of my friends asked me to come see a high school football game of which he is the coach.  Being that both of us had an acknowledged romantic interest in one another and it wasn’t TOO far out of the way, I quickly changed my route, put the address of the school in Sprint Navigation on my phone, and off I was…

and three hours later, when they won the game, I was somewhere on a dirt road in Laurens County, GA, crying because I couldn’t find the school.

Fast forward to yesterday and I am frustrated in downtown Atlanta, unable to find my way back to campus from a store I went to only three miles away.

Then last night I got a series of calls and text from Coach, basically saying that all he wanted from me, for now, was sex and friendship, although he’d led me to believe otherwise at the beginning of … well… whatever we had.

And as I sat in my car crying, having just found my way back to campus, I realized that I’d been lost far longer than a few minutes, and that it wasn’t the streets of Atlanta or the back roads of Laurens County that I was having trouble navigating.

These past few months have had one recurring theme: failed relationships… failed relationship attempts… basically, if I kiss anyone, it’s pretty much guaranteed that in as few as 3 weeks our conversations will be few, far-in-between, and strained.

Don’t believe me?  Check it out:

  1. Big Blue, who asked for a relationship, then, two months later, said he didn’t know if he should be in one when the school year starts.
  2. ArtKid, who became less and less attractive as time went on, although we had a lot in common.  Finally, he came right out and said he “wasn’t looking for anything serious”.  This was AFTER the $1 cheeseburger incident.
  3. Crump, a relic of my past, came back into my life briefly to invite me over to watch a movie late at night (that we actually watched), then proceed to ask me, the next week, if I would mind being his friend with benefits because, although he had feelings for me, he didn’t know if they should result in a relationship.  We just plain don’t speak anymore.
  4. Softy, who has made it crystal clear that he’s been through far too much with women to start a relationship right now, but that he still wants to be with me, just in an unofficial way (WTF is that?  Can someone please let me know?).  We go to Pinkberry every once in a while.
  5. SweetnSour, the guy who ogled at me all summer, got my phone number in the fall, and proceeded to come to my room and get naked while I took a call outside.  Don’t you know this fool wanted to act surprised when I asked him to put his clothes back on?  Needless to say, I haven’t heard from him since.  Note to self: never give your number to a football player.
  6. Oldie, an ex-football player at my school whom I had a lot of fun with in the last year, but who sort of fell off the face of the Earth this summer after saying that he actually did want something serious from me.  Imagine that.
  7. LeJuan (his name is it’s own mildly-insulting pseudonym) who asked for my number, invited me over, and let me take an epic nap in his bed alone.  He’s a nice guy, but there’s no real connection.
  8. Coach, the latest of my bad experiences, who wants only sex and friendship unless the friendship “happens to grow into a relationship”.  Oh, so you want a plaything?  And you want ME to be that plaything?  Oooohhhh cool, I’d love to!  Perhaps I can put it on my resume!

For the past few months, I’ve been thinking it was them.  They were all weird.  I just chose the wrong people to get involved with.  They’re just jerks.

But now I see that it’s me.  I’m looking for things in men that I can’t find in myself.

And if I can’t find it in myself, how the hell am I supposed to even begin to attract someone with those qualities that I really want who will be serious about me?

So I’ve decided to take a step back from the dating world in general.  I’m not even trying anymore.  And I’m making a new resolution to help me back it up:

Starting October 1st (just because it’s a good date), I pledge to be consciously celibate for an entire year.  That means no sex (duh), no “dry-humping” as people like to call it, no mouth play, no nothing.  Basically, if it ain’t kissing or hugging, and it ain’t upright, I can’t do it.  I’m hoping that, without the distraction of sex, I can learn to eradicate all of the poisonous things in my life and figure out more about myself.

So, world, I’d like to welcome you not only to my hair journey, but a new life journey.  This year, ranging from October 1st, 2010 to October 1st, 2011, will hereby be known as my year without meat.  #lehNOTdoit

Peace, Love, and Celibacy,


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